Socializing Successfully With Your Boss or Employees

Seven important guidelines to ensure enjoyable, but trouble-free, after hours mingling

by Bill Lampton, Ph.D.

 

ONE: Avoid off color humor

The jokes you would tell your golf buddies could jeopardize your professional reputation if you share them with workplace colleagues, no matter how informal the setting. True, they might laugh out of courtesy, or maybe from discomfort. Yet you risk losing their respect. Play safe. Don't tell any joke that you wouldn't tell at an office staff meeting.

 

TWO: Refrain from touching

...other than a handshake greeting, unless you happen to go dancing with the group. Draping an arm around a colleague might prompt an eventual lawsuit, especially when you don't give that person an expected raise. And the employee who caresses the boss can create an image of fakery and pandering.

 

THREE: Drink moderately

Every year, holiday parties, company picnics and similar outings become career graveyards for bosses and employees who want to become "the life of the party."

Sometimes we assume that two more drinks will help us talk more easily. That's a mistake. Two more drinks will encourage you to talk more--period. The impaired speaking and unsteady walk that follow those extra cocktails could brand you: "lush," "a drunk," "undisciplined," or something similar. 

Along those lines, never mention that drinking is important to you. Stay away from "Nothing like a stiff drink at the end of the day to help a guy unwind." Whimsically, we slip into comments like that, such as "Thought that bartender would never bring our order." Although you are trying to inject a bit of levity into the conversation, the quips could backfire, categorizing you as a problem drinker.

 

FOUR: Make sure you circulate among everyone present

Make sure you circulate among everyone present, not just the managerial group you feel most comfortable with. The person who talks with his or her clique and avoids everyone else nullifies the inclusive good will the event is intended to foster. Spend time with line employees as well as "the suits."

 

FIVE: Avoid shop talk

Demonstrate that you have an interesting,meaningful life away from the corporation. Nobody wants to hear your opinions about a five year plan, a drop in sales or the employee you had to fire. 

As an old song advises, "talk happy talk, things that people like to hear." Stay well informed about major sporting events, releases of new movies, great places to vacation, new restaurants your friends have recommended, bestselling books and national events. Definitely, party goers want to talk about them, not corporate problems and plans.

 

SIX: Listen attentively

Good listeners become our favorite people. We move away from motormouths who dominate conversations. Encourage others to talk, with comments like "very interesting," "tell me more," and "What happened next?"

When Stephen Covey wrote 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, he titled chapter five, "Seek first to understand, and then to be understood." Follow that advice, and you'll become the hit of the company's social outing.

 

SEVEN: Mind your manners

If the occasion includes a meal, pay special attention to your table etiquette. You want to look like you belong at top-tier banquets. Illustrate that you have acquired polish and grace. 

Need a refresher on manners and other public protocol? Then I suggest the book 5 Steps to Professional Presence, by Susan Bixler and Lisa Scherrer Dugan.

 

 

How to Write a Professional Email

Email is a common and convenient way to communicate to companies, colleagues, employers, employees, professors and others who require formal communication. The smallest mistake can make a negative impression. There are a number of ways you can improve and enhance your email etiquette.

• Because emails are automatically given a time and date stamp, you do not have to put this information in the email unless you want to do so.
• Begin the email with a greeting. Because you are aiming for a professional touch, think of it as writing a letter. Make it simple with a quick "Hello/Hi" If you know who you are writing to, it is best to use the professional form of the recipient's name (e.g. Mr., Mrs., Professor or Dr.).
• Get right to the point. The first paragraph should be about who you are and why you are sending the email.
• Don't beat around the bush. The second paragraph should contain the information you are providing or the request you are making. State the desired follow through of the situation.
• If there are any attachments, mention them in the email so that the receiver knows to look for and open the files. Also, appropriately name the attachments so that the receiver knows what each document is just by looking at the name.
• Provide a closing statement. Start by thanking the receiver for his or her time. Courtesy is always important, no matter how short the email really is. Include an accurate follow-up statement such as, "I will contact you again with further information," or "I look forward to hearing your ideas." If a response is required, be sure to state that information in the message.
• In your professional email account, you should have a signature set up. This will automatically add on to the bottom of the email. You should include your full professional name, job title and contact information. Depending on policy, you may also want to include a link to the company's website or social media pages.

Instant Messaging Etiquette In Business

Whilst instant messaging has been around for quite some time and is more popular with teenagers, it is also used in business too. Many business men and women find it’s a useful tool for keeping in touch with both clients and colleagues when they’re working remotely and need to find out information or want to ask a question quickly.

Use Of The Away Message Alerts

For those of you who are familiar with instant messaging (IM), you’ll know all about the away message alerts you can switch on or off beside your name so that people will know if you’re available to message. One of the most important aspects of instant messaging etiquette in business is to respect these. Therefore, if somebody’s alert says ‘away’ or ‘busy’, treat that in much the same way as you would a ‘do not disturb’ sign on a door.

In other words, if the alert says they’re busy, do not send them an instant message until they put up the alert saying they’re available. Even where it does say ‘available’, it’s always polite to ask first if they’ve got a bit of time to spare.

Be Brief

Don’t type long winded paragraphs when using instant messaging. What you need to say should be concise and to the point. On the other hand, don’t revert to ‘text speak’ either. Abbreviations like LOL (laugh out loud) or BRB (be right back) might be perfectly acceptable within an instant messaging conversation you’re having with your best friend but might not be understood or thought appropriate by a colleague or client.

Be Careful What You Write

There is a danger in thinking that an instant messaging conversation is supposed to be between two people and that, therefore, whatever you say is private and confidential. However, that’s far from the truth. Just as an email can be sent around the office so too can instant m essenger conversations be saved and then redistributed. Therefore, don’t include anything that you wouldn’t be prepared to write in an email or typed letter.

Avoid Confrontation

Instant messenger communications in business should be only be used for things like arranging a meeting or to ask a quick question to which you’re looking for a quick response. Don’t use it to criticize or to reprimand somebody. These are situations which require face to face communication.

Using Emoticons

Emoticons are more the domain of people who are using instant messaging in more of a social setting but if they’re used within the organization you’re working in, use them sparingly. For example, a smiley face to indicate your pleasure at something somebody has told you is probably fine but don’t pepper your instant messaging conversations with them as it can become confusing and isn't good etiquette.

Separate Log Ins For Business And Pleasure

If you use instant messenger for social purposes too, make sure you use a separate log in if you’re using it for business purposes as well. Instant messenger should only be used sparingly at work anyway as it can distract you from the business in hand but your boss will not be at all pleased if they’re paying you to work when you’re chatting away to your friends about what you’re wearing in the pub tonight.

Networking

Instant messaging can be a useful networking tool for people who work from home in a self-employed capacity. It doesn't harm to put your IM identity on your virtual business card or as a signature at the bottom of your emails as it may be a useful way of networking and establishing new business contacts.

How to Fit in to a New Workplace

It doesn’t matter how much self-confidence you have starting a new job in a new workplace is daunting for everybody. Whilst you might begin your first day exuberant and excited about the new challenges ahead, you’re also likely to be feeling nervous, daunted and quite stressed. This is all perfectly natural, however, and it’s important to remember that your new employer, as well as the colleagues you’ll be working with, will not be expecting miracles straight away and that they’ll want to help you settle in as quickly and as smoothly as possible. They’ll have been the ‘newbie’ too at some time or other, remember. There are, however, some useful steps you can take to make the transition as smooth and as painless as possible.

Clothing

Probably the first thing you’ll want to know before you even start work, if you don’t already know, is what the appropriate dress code is. You don’t want to look as if you’re going to a dinner dance if you turn up and everyone is dressed casually. Yet, neither will you want to turn up in jeans if everyone’s wearing business suits so, in order that you ‘blend in’ on your first day, it’s important to dress appropriately. Don’t just assume that “it’s this type of company so it will probably be OK to wear that”. Even within the same industry, there can be very different accepted dress codes.

Ask Questions

Don’t be afraid to ask questions of both your immediate supervisor, your colleagues and your boss. They can’t expect you to know everything straight away so they’ll be expecting a barrage of questions from you anyway so you shouldn’t feel stupid asking a lot of questions. Remember, companies would rather you asked a hundred questions than blindly try to carry out your duties without really knowing what you’re doing as it can prove very costly both in monetary times and in time lost if you carry on regardless only to find that the errors you’ve made need to all be fixed later so, if you have any doubts about anything, you should just ask.

Learn How the Equipment Works

Whether you have an office job or you work in a manual capacity, you’re bound to come up against some kind of tools or machinery that you’ve never worked with before so find out the equipment you need to use and how it works. It’s often handy to scribble down a few notes or stick Post-It instructions up as learning how new machinery works can sometimes be complex and, if someone has taken a fair amount of time explaining how something works, you should try to grasp the basics straight away so that you don’t have to keep pulling them away from their work to repeat the instructions.

Be Proactive

As a ‘newbie’ on staff, you’ll probably find that you won’t often be given too much to do over the course of your first few days as your employer will be more interested in helping you settle in initially and to just give you a ‘feel’ of what you’re going to be faced with later. However, if you find that you’ve taken to your new role like a ‘duck to water’, don’t just sit there idly twiddling your thumbs and staring out of the window but be proactive and ask your supervisor or colleagues nearby if you can do anything else for them. They may be glad of the extra help.

Be Friendly

It’s important you don’t overpower your new work colleagues with ‘chit-chat’ during your first few days and don’t get involved in office gossip either – you’re there to work after all. However, that doesn’t mean you should bury your head in paperwork or hide behind your computer screen or machine either. Take your cues from your colleagues and if they are chatting away as they’re working, make sure you join in too. The sooner you get to know your colleagues, the more settled, comfortable and ‘part of the firm’ you’ll feel. Be considerate and respectful too.

Don’t Overdo It!

Remember, you’ve been given this new job on your merits. This might be because of how you came across at interview, the skills you’re bringing with you and other personal qualities and it will probably be a combination of all three. So, whilst it’s important that you’re able to carry out your duties as best you can and as soon as you can, don’t try to over-impress by staying back and working late or taking on too many responsibilities above and beyond your job description too soon as you may find that you’ll be continually played on in the future.

Different people will settle into new jobs at different rates and, if you’ve joined the company alongside other new recruits at the same time, don’t get upset or frustrated if it takes you a little longer to settle in and to grasp new concepts and ways of doing things. Somebody will always be the quickest and somebody will always be the slowest – that’s just life. The key thing to remember is to simply do your best, to ask questions if need be and to be friendly and courteous. As long as you follow these tips, you should find that, within a few weeks, you’ll think you have been in the job for years and always remember, there’s always going to be another ‘newbie’ to take that label off you soon enough.

Top 6 Rules for Using Cell Phones at Work

Having your cell phone at work can be useful but it can also be very disruptive. Your friends and family can reach you anytime, anywhere, which can be annoying.

When you're on your own time, the choice to turn off your cell phone is entirely yours. When it comes to using your cell phone at work, however, you have to be mindful of your co-workers and your boss, not to mention your own ability to get your job done. Here are some rules you should follow if you have your cell phone at work.

1. Turn Your Cell Phone Ringer Off

If you have your cell phone at work, it shouldn't ring. If you don't want to turn off your cell phone completely, at least set it to vibrate. The sounds of different ring tones going off all the time can be very annoying to others. In addition, you don't want your boss to know how often you get calls.

2. Use Your Cell Phone Only for Important Calls

If you have your cell phone at work, you should only use it for important calls. What should you classify as an important call? The school nurse calling to say your child is ill, your child calling to say he's arrived home from school safely, and family emergencies that you must deal with immediately are important. Your friend calling to chat, your child calling to say the dog had an accident, or your mom calling to tell you your cousin Tilly is engaged should not be considered important.

3. Let Your Cell Phone Calls Go to Voice Mail

While you are at work if you are in doubt about whether an incoming call is important, let voice mail pick it up. It will take much less time to check your messages than it will to answer the call and then tell the caller you can't talk.

4. Find a Private Place to Make Cell Phone Calls

While it's okay to use your cell phone at work for private calls during breaks, don't stay at your desk. Find somewhere else to talk, where your conversation can't be overheard, even if what you're discussing isn't personal. You may be on a break but your co-workers have a job to do.

5. Don't Bring Your Cell Phone Into the Restroom ... Ever

This rule should apply to using your cell phone at work or anywhere. Why? Well, if you must ask you never know who's in there; the person on the other end of the line will hear bathroom sounds, e.g., toilets flushing; it is an invasion of your co-workers' privacy.

6. Don't Bring Your Cell Phone to Meetings

Even if you have your cell phone set to vibrate, if you receive a call you will be tempted to see who it's from. This is not only rude, it is a clear signal to your boss that your mind isn't 100 percent on your job. All calls can wait until your meeting is over or until there is a break. Remember, there was a time before we had cell phones.

Telephone Etiquette at Work

The telephone is often the first point of contact a customer or client will have with a company so it is very important that you make a good impression when you’re answering the phone. Obviously in specific telephone-related jobs such as sales, customer service and marketing, you’re going to need to adopt different styles and techniques in order to be successful, such as being able to handle difficult complaint calls or being persuasive enough to encourage people to buy a product or service from your company but in general terms, even if you only answer the phone as a routine matter of course as part of your overall duties, there are guidelines and etiquette to be followed.

Be Prompt Whenever Possible

Unless you are working in a busy call centre or on a switchboard, be as prompt as possible in answering the phone. Potential clients and many customers lead busy lives and if you let the phone ring too long before answering, they might have already hung up and taken their business elsewhere.

Greetings and Mood

Firstly, we all have off days when we feel the world is against us or we’re simply too busy or do not feel in the mood for work or we might even feel a little under the weather. Whilst all these things can happen to us from time to time, the last thing a caller needs to hear on the other end of the phone is a sullen voice which gives off the impression that you can’t be bothered talking. So, it’s important to be upbeat and positive when answering the phone. Smiling before you pick up the phone often helps in this regard. Always greet the caller according to the time of day and identify yourself with either a first name or first name and surname, unless your company has a strict ‘no name’ policy, and the company name followed by establishing the reason for the call. An example might be, “Good morning, Washington Tyres, Paul speaking. How can I help you?”

Be Prepared

You never know how simple or complex the nature of call might be so it’s important that you’re prepared and know to handle the call. If you’re working on a busy switchboard, you’ll need to understand how to transfer calls internally and you should also keep a pen and pad handy so you can jot down details of the call as the caller may need you to take certain action on their behalf so it’s important that this is conveyed accurately. Information you could be looking to gather might include the caller’s name, company name (if applicable), time and date of call, reason for call and their contact details.

Putting Callers on Hold

People hate being put on hold although most of them do understand that it is sometimes inevitable. If you need to place a caller on hold for any reason, firstly tell them why and ask them if they object to being placed on hold. If they agree it is OK, and you find that you’re still going to be delayed in getting them the information they need or being put through to the right person because they’re busy, you should go back to the caller every minute or so, explain that you’re still trying to put them through to ‘X’ or get the information they need and ask them if they would still like to be put back on hold. And, you should repeat this every minute until either you can resolve the situation or they decide to try again another time.

Ending the Call

Before ending the call, you should always try to recap what you’ve discussed, if appropriate, and ask the caller if there is anything else you can help them with before saying ‘goodbye’ and hanging up. It’s also good practice to let the caller hang up before you do.

Passing on Messages to Colleagues

If you’ve been asked to pass a message on to a work colleague, always do so as soon as possible. The longer you leave it, the more likely you will either forget to do so or you’ll pass on incorrect details of the call.

Other Useful Tips

• Never chew gum or be eating when you’re answering the phone. It sounds extremely unprofessional to the person at the other end of the line
• Speak slightly more slowly on the phone than you would if you were having a general face-to-face conversation. Important details can get overlooked if you speak too quickly and it also saves you from having to repeat yourself. This is especially true if you have a very pronounced regional accent
• Keep an eye on the time – If you’re the one calling others, remember that at lunchtimes and after 5pm, it is often difficult to get hold of people and you may either find you hit voicemail or the recipient may not be best pleased to take your calls at certain times of day
• Never make outgoing calls of a personal nature unless your employer has given you explicit permission to do so and make sure you dissuade relatives and friends from calling you at work.

In general, however, if you’re friendly, courteous and helpful, answering the phone should not present you with too many problems.